Lawyers

If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?

Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?

What do chickens think we taste like?

What do people in China call their good plates?

What do you call a male ladybug?

What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald
man?

When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?

Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you
can't drink and drive?

Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Why are there Interstates in Hawaii?

Why are there flotation devices in the seats of planes instead
of parachutes?

Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations where smoking is
prohibited?

Have you ever imagined a world without hypothetical
situations?

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?

If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why does
it have locks on the door?

Why is a bra singular and panties plural?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on
airplanes,  why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

If a firefighter fights fire and a crime fighter fights crime,
what does a freedom fighter fight?

If a cow laughs, does milk come out of her nose?

If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn your
headlights on, what happens?

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up
ATM?

Why is it that when you transport something by car it is
called shipment, but when you transport something by ship it's
called cargo?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

What would Geronimo say if he jumped out of an airplane?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck
together?

If con is the opposite of pro; is Congress the opposite of
progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

My Name

This is a special post for me and one of my best bro - Ryan. I want to thanks him for doing all this for me! He such a nice guy! thanks lo! Now i only know my name can be so meaningful! haha.... Hope you all like it! thanks again lo! MY twin bro - Ryan! hehe! XD

LEONG

[L]ive to
[E]xperience an
[O]n-going,
[N]ever-ending,
[G]od-given life.

RYAN

[R]ainbow after raining,
[Y]esterday soon forgetting.
[A]head seem blurry,
[N]ow to worry.

LEW CHEE LEONG

[L]eft out in
[E]xtreme cold.
[W]ithout

[C]ourage to lift my
[H]ead up to face the
[E]motions i
[E]xperience inside.

[L]onging for someone to
[E]ase to pain, to help me face these
[O]rdeals. i
[N]eed to face the
[G]host inside of me.

Want to test your IQ - try the question below:

  There is a mute who wants to buy a toothbrush.
 By imitating the action of brushing one's teeth he successfully
 expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done.
 Now if there is a blind man who wishes to buy a pair of
 sunglasses, how should he express himself?

 Think about it first before scrolling down for the answer.
















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He just has to open his mouth and ask, so simple.
 If you got this wrong please go dig a hole and hide!

P.S. I'm writing this from the hole I had to dig and am hiding
in!......(Damn)...

Trial Exam

SPM trial exam is coming. Haiz, i not yet do anything lo! so scare. Hope i can do well in this exam! cos it is very important to me! I will close my blog from now! So that i can focus more on my exam! So, you wont see any update again! sorry for that! Hope can see you all soon! i'm sure will miss you all. Goodbye lo!

CLOSE!

Excellent poems by not so famous poets... found on toilet doors and walls..........

Excellent poems by not so famous poets... found on toilet doors and walls..........

A budding poet trying his best...

Here I lie in stinky vapor,
Because some bastard stole the toilet paper,
Shall I lie, or shall I linger,
Or shall I be forced to use my finger.

Before he graduated to be a poet, he wrote this...

Here I sit
Broken hearted
Tried to shit
But only farted

Someone who had a different experience wrote,

You're lucky,
You had your chance.
I tried to fart,
And shit in my pants!

Perhaps it's true that people find inspiration in toilets.

I came here
To shit and stink.
But all I do
Is sit and think.

There are also people who come in for a different purpose.. .

Some come here to sit and think
Some come here to shit and stink
But I come here to scratch my balls ,
And read the bu! llshit on the walls...

Toilets walls also double as job advertisement space.......

(Written high upon the wall)
If you can piss above this line,
the Singapore Fire Department wantsyou.

Ministry of Environment advertisement.

We aim to please!
You aim too!.. Please.

On the inside of a toilet door:

Patrons are requested to remain seated
throughout the entire performance.

And finally, this should teach some a lesson...
Sign seen at a restaurant:

The hands that clean these toilets also make your food...
Please aim properly.


haha...... is kinda funny. this is one of my friend send it to me. I want to share it with you all!
Hope you all enjoy reading! XD

Tips for getting straight A in PMR

PMR, Easy job only! Piece of cake! For me, if is easy and if you do not get the result you want, the only thing you can do is just blame yourself! Cos do not put your 100% effort into it! I giving some tips when i study for PMR exam! I don't know it can help you or not but it help me to get 8A.

I start with the most important subject - Bahasa Melayu and Bahasa Inggeris. It is quite hard to score A cos it is depend on the essay you write! So you need to score very good in paper 1 the objective question! try do not do careless mistake in paper 1 cos it going to help you a lot! Essay?? I just can advice you don't do the format question. cos when you miss one step, mark will be deduced! And format essay usually don't have many point to write! But if you feel very confident about the question you doing! Just go ahead! Do your best!!

Next is math! This one you need to do a lot of question! Do past year question will help you a lot! Cos math is same every year! You just need to know how to do the question only! You know one, you know all! Understand and memories the formula. It will help you. Do many many question!

Science, many people say it is hard! But actually it is easy only! you just need to read and do excise. Do note when you do revision! It will help you to remember it better! Always listen to teacher!

Sejarah, it is so easy only! You just need to read, read and read! Nothing more you can do besides read the sejarah text book! Geografi is a bonus A for you! nothing hard! just study and get A.

Kh?? no comment! cos everyone taking different things!!
hahaha.........

Seven

Seven, a special number for me! i like seven so much! I write this post is because i been tagged by one of my best friend! haha.... Really enjoy to write this post! Long time didn't update my blog, so i going to write many post! Hope you won't feel so sick when reading it!!

seven things to do before you die:
1. Go to London
2. Take picture with my best buddy!
3. Be with the one i love
4. See the aurora light at north pole and also green light
5. Become rich and buy the things i always want
6. Become an artist that are cool in music
7. Publish my own book

seven things you can do
1. I can read. For sure anyone also can read.
2. I can play horn. Not really good cos just learn three year only!
3. I can sing. But not dare to sing in public!
4. I can be a good listener. Anyone can tell me they secret cos i mute!
5. I can marching. But i march like a robot!(All my friends say that)
6. I can be friendly. It just depend on the person only.
7. I can be emo too! haha.....

seven celebrity crushes
1. Avril Lavigne
2. Stephanie Sun
3. Gwen Stefani
4. Penny Tai
4. Lee Xin Jie
5. Tanya Tsia
6. Shen Cai Jing
7. Jay?? haha....

seven most repeated phrases/words
1. F.U
2. What you want?
3. ok
4. Qing cai
5. Sorry
6. Thank you
7. Haiz

seven physical traits to look for in the opposite sex
1. Average height and weight
2. Long hair
3. Pretty
4. Average body shape
5. Cute
6. Good fashion taste
7. Small head

seven tags to go to
1. Ivy Tan
2. Wendy
3. Cheryl
4. Ryan Lem
5. Gimmy(Depend on you want to write or not)
6. Michelle
7. Wayne

《不能说的秘密》

《不能说的秘密》

冷咖啡离开了杯垫
我忍住的情绪在很后面
拼命想挽回的从前
在我脸上依旧清晰可见

最美的不是下雨天
是曾与你躲过雨的屋檐
回忆的画面 在荡着秋千 梦开始不甜

你说把爱渐渐放下会走更远
又何必去改变你走过的世界
你用你的指尖
阻止我说再见
想像你在身边才完全失去之前

你说把爱渐渐放下会走更远
或许命运的签只让我们遇见
只让我们相恋这一季的秋天
飘落后才发现这幸福的碎片

要我怎么捡